So this is Christmas!!!

Christmas!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  

At Breakfast

My birthday just passed and it sooooo much fun!  Joel surprised me and took me out to breakfast then to the Tucson botanical gardens!  There they has a butterfly exhibit where you can walk into this green house looking place and it's filled with plants, fish, a nice path, and hundreds of different breeds of butterflies!  It was gorgeous! 

Joel's new Best Friend

Sooo Pretty

I just love the Blue

This is one of my Favorites

Gorgeous 

After we got down there I spent some time with Kyle during lunch then to top off the evening we went to the movies to watch "The Hobbit" which was amazing!  I'm so excited to watch the next one!  Then Joel got me a cinnamon bun and put candles in it as his Mom and him sang Happy Birthday and then I got sad.  Because Joel works Thursday nights and I didn't want to be alone on my birthday night... but then Joel whispers.. "I got the night off..." I just about cried my eyes out and slapped him.  He is so Ahhhh-Mazing! 

Safe to say my Birthday was a success.  

Now it is time for Christmas.  We are leaving to Payson today to have Christmas with my Parents for the weekend.  I'm so excited for Kyle!!!!  He already started to open on of his presents... He's very sneaky! But I made a lot of homemade gifts this year so I'm excited to see what everyone thinks of them... and idk I just feel so happy.  

This season reminds me of my Grandpa Haynes, who passed away in the Summer of 2007.  He was a big goof ball.  I remember when he and my grandma used to live next door to us in California.  My Grandpa Loved Christmas too... just as much as we did it seemed.  Usually around my birthday they would mosey on over to celebrate my birthday with my family.  Then as things would wind down he would walk over to the Christmas Tree and look at all the presents... he'd grab one with his name on it then sit back down on the couch and began to shake his present... now my brothers and I were young so we would practically bed our parents for us to open at least one present early... never worked... well until Grandpa came along.  Because after he shake it and start to ponder what it could be... he would "Sneeze" and the wrapping paper would fly off the present.  My grandpa would be like, "Oh dear looked what happened... well since it's already opened might as well see what it is."  So after my grandpa did it my brothers and I would chime in and would also get to open one present each.. sometimes more depending on if Grandpa was on a "Sneezing Spree" or not.

I must say that although this year has been tough... I think it has been a successful one at that.  I feel like a new person.  After all my life events of going through depression, being pregnant with complications, having a baby, and becoming a good mother... I think I've become a stronger person.  I'm finally starting to believe in myself.  

God has truly blessed My Life. <3

The Good and the Bad

Before I get into it I would like to say, "HAPPY 12-12-2012" I guess it's a pretty cool day but it isn't life changing.

Joel and I have been going through some life changing things these past few days.  We went to my parents last weekend and when we got back we were shocked to see that our 2 front doors were unlocked and opened.  At first I wondered if it was possible that we left it that way... but no... the only reason I know this for sure is because I remember Joel running back inside to get his coffee and yelling at him to lock the doors before we left for our weekend trip.  Our metal framed door was wide open and our front door was unlocked.  I thought for sure someone had taken all our stuff and/or was still in there hiding.

When we got inside everything looked normal... it almost seemed like nothing had been touched... but even though it seemed that way I still had this eerie feeling that someone had walked through our house.  I was creep out! The only thoughts that came to mind was that little girl who had vanished in the middle of the night just from out of her own window.  What if this person was looking for Kyle or even myself.  The night we left was a Friday... those are the nights that Joel normally works and isn't home... we talked to our neighbor and she said she noticed the door was open Friday Night and thought I was home... Ug Sooo Scary!

Well it's safe to say we're not staying the night there anymore.  We're just going to pack up the place and get out.  We filed a police report so if it happens again to us or someone in the future, it's on file.

So other than that whole mishap, Joel and I are figuring out our futures and how we're going to provide for our family.  He didn't get the job he interviewed for in Payson so now we're faced with the choice of having nothing and just live with my parents or with me moving up there with Kyle and Joel staying down making and saving money for two months then bring his business up to Payson probably in February.  It's been a hard decision.  Our situation itself isn't normal... no matter what I don't want to live here in Tucson.

With all of this stuff happening  I came to the realization that I haven't been talking to God about it.  He's the one part of the equation that we haven't included.  I feel like he's been trying to get my attention for a while now and I'm just now starting to notice it.  So I am finally including Him and at this point in our lives I feel like He knows where we need to turn next.

Lead me into this mess and I pray I come out of it a stronger and more Godly person!

Oh and try dealing with all this while you're PMSing!!! Not a pretty sight!

I feel better now.  Next time will be more chipper I promise!

God BLess

Tis the season to Freak Out!

My Parents Christmas Tree

Well I'm back to reality!  I went up to my parents for two weeks and it was nice.  It has been nice to spend Thanksgiving with them and decorate for Christmas once again... its been a few years since I've gotten to do that. As I've "Grown Up" its the little things I miss the most about my previous life.  The life without responsibilities... where Homework was the worst news you could hear and even then I could ignore that and go out and play til we either got into trouble or got to tired to run.  When Christmas rolls around I feel like I'm falling in Love all over again... I get all giddy, and happy.  I start to decorate and get excited about the little things.  Now that Kyle is here my Energy Boost for the holidays has SKYROCKETED! 

Kyle's new Christmas PJ's

My Ginger Sugar bread Family!

The lights on my Parents home

Now I know how my parents felt when they spent our first Christmas's with us.  I can hardly contain myself when I think about him opening presents! 

Kyle helping me Pack

My stress about moving to a different city is getting to me.  I hate that it's happening near the holiday season. But I just want to get out of here.  Tucson is was too Traumatizing for me!  I feel like the crime you here on the news shouldn't be happening to you next door   It needs to stay on the news! LOL.  Moving up to Payson just sounds like the best plan for us.  I'm going to miss my family and friends, and the Church but we gotta move for Kyle's sake.  I can't have him growing up thinking that violence is normal and not being able to walk around your own block is terrifying, which for me it is.   

But moving in general stresses me out.  We need to pack and save money for a deposit up in Payson.. but the fact that we don't know if Joel will even have a job stresses me out.  He does however have a interview this Friday so I'm praying it works out and he gets the job.  It would be the answers to my prayers for this family.  Once he gets a job THEN we can put down a holding deposit on a place we like... but without a job it's hard to know where we're moving too!  And WHEN!!?!?! If he gets the job we move in 2 weeks... Ahhh if he doesn't get the job... well... idk... maybe in a month... but if he doesn't have a job and we still move, we'll have to move in with my parents which is something I don't want to do.  Not because I don't get along with them... but because I'd feel like I was intruding.. but I guess that's what family is for.  

Well I feel better now that I finally got that off my chest.  I'm still stressing but I know deep down that God has this under control.  I just get so anxious! Deep Breaths Jen! 

Well to make this post less intense.. Joel, Kyle, and I took family portraits today!  They are SOOOO Adorable! I got the CD of the pics so I'll post them soon! Kyle was smiling the whole time! Well gotta get back to working on Christmas Presents!  Merry Christmas!

Portrait taking time!

Xoxo