Life has been so full of ups and downs (as life should be) that it's all finally starting to catch up with me.
The Ups: Kyle has officially turned one!!! We had a fun party for him and his new best friend Katy played with him the whole day. And he got to eat a cupcake all by himself! Also, Joel got a job and got a lot of hours! Glory to God! And we got an apartment which we'll be moving into next week! We're sooooo excited! I've been going to water aerobics every Monday and Wednesday! We take Kyle to the library for Story Time as well... he loves it! Things are going pretty good!
The Downs: My anxiety level lately has been through the roof. Usually when I have this kind of issue it's easy to manage and I can just take a bath and feel better. But for some reason this is just not going away. I feel like several things are coming at me at once and I just can't sort it out. It's stressful enough having to move, but my whole Newland side of the family is here... and things just feel... weird. It's also full of tension since we just had a huge argument with a Aunt and my Cousin... and things haven't been completely resolved. And one top of this... it's been a year since my Best Friend Bobby passed.
It doesn't seem like a lot when I say it out loud but my emotions are just everywhere... I'm stressed and anxious, angry/upset, and sad. I guess my body just can't handle all these emotions at one. And because of that... I've been feeling sick, tired, I can't breath sometimes... sometimes it gets so bad I can't function...
Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day. Even though I've been very stressed its been nice to dream about our new place... I'm super excited! AND my sissy in law's baby is due next week! EEK! Something to get excited about!
With all that's going on both good and bad I thank God for everything He puts me through... I wouldn't be as strong and as spiritual as a person without Him. I'm constantly reminded that I'm living for Him and when I make plans, God is too!
I had an amazing moment a few days ago while I was riding in the car. The song "Animal" by Neon Trees came on ( I love that song) and my heart fluttered cause Bobby popped into my mind... so I started to burst out into song and sang it at the top of my lungs... as I did... I felt Bobby's soul with me... he was yelling the song in my ear of course... but I could feel him there! That moment has really comforted me during this tough year of him being gone.
xoxo
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